We have a little black cat who adopted us about six months ago. We had avoided getting a pet even though Andy and I both love animals. We said we didn't want to be tied down, wanted to be free to do some travelling when ever we liked. But the truth is, we were both afraid of having a pet, loving it and loosing it. It's happened to both of us many times before. You think you'd get stronger with each little loss. It doesn't work that way, it just gets harder and harder.
This morning I came downstairs to find the little cat curled up in a tight knot in his bed. When I touched him he didn't move, just gave a little cry of pain. My heart sank! He had been in a cat fight. Over one eye was a scratch from a sharp set of claws. The other eye was cloudy and weepy.
I could feel panic rising in my chest. It's the only time I feel it, when someone or something I love is hurt or unwell. I live in fear of this little cat being run over by a car, savaged by other animals or abused by someone who doesn't value animal life the way we do. Now I was terrified he was going to be blinded in one eye.
Fortunately, things aren't as grim as they seemed at first. After a quiet day and lots of rest, the little cat is looking better. He has finally eaten a bit of food and his eye is looking better,too. We have adopted a 'wait and see' approach and if he isn't much better by morning, he is off to the Vets.
The panic in me has subsided and I am grateful he is our cat. I know we will do everything that can be done for him to give him a happy, healthy life. He is such a pleasure, such good company and so much fun. He gives us so much more than we give him. Our lives would be diminished without pets. It's worth fighting the fear and dread of loss.
This applies to people,too. We all must be brave....not be afraid to love.